How Strange It Is To Be Anything At All

Sunday I spent all day traveling from New York to Colorado for a little vacation and change of scenery. It was a beautifully sunny day, everything went smoothly, I started reading this book (Further Along The Road Less Traveled) and it helped me feel really in tune with myself and this incredible world. I wrote the following while I was in en route in the sky.  

It's amazing that I've been in a plane most of the day, but I feel more grounded in the sky, surrounded by strangers, than I did on land. There's something about staring out a plane window, and watching the people and the cities that surround them become smaller by the second. I keep watching the cars, and can't help but think of them being filled with different people, each on a separate mission, unaware of each other's goals/struggles/missions. Pretty soon I scan the narrow road lines for cars, and they're no longer visible. I can now see which way the wind blows across the fields, and the farms that belong to those fields, only indicated by darker smears, going all in the same direction. I see long, moving shadows that belong to windmills in a row. Pretty soon I can no longer see the farms, or the windmills. The earth becomes a patchwork quilt, covered in veins, puckered up where the land rises. 

I feel very small and truly humbled by this world, this life. I feel a sense of peace that I haven't felt in a long time. I feel overwhelmed by how wonderful everything is in my life at this very moment. I've actually been teary-eyed for the last ten minutes on a plane. Teary-eyed in the best way possible, where it's difficult to feel embarrassed over the somewhat public display of emotion. I guess they would best be described as tears of gratitude, which are absolutely the best kind. I am just stunned at the personal epiphanies and spiritual growth I've made this year. I chose to let this season of my life strengthen me rather than letting it destroy me. This year has been full of learning, healing, and joy. I am so grateful for the family that I was born into and the friends I've made along this curious, challenging, incredible journey. I feel so lucky to be a part of their lives and elated that they are in mine. It makes me so proud to see all of the things that these talented people have made and shared. It makes my heart happy to feel such encouragement from people that I so greatly admire. 

2012 has brought sobering struggles, beautiful friendships, and an enormous spiritual awakening. I am so looking forward to this new year with new endeavors, continuing friendships, embracing family, and finding happiness in each new day that the universe grants me. 

So long 2012, you were difficult but forced me to grow, and in your own strange way, you were a good one.

Fireworks Above Us, A Screaming Bloom

I am in disbelief at how quickly the Summer came and went, and how much adventure and joy I managed to squeeze out of it. I've been clinging desperately to what's left, but have spent most my time recalling and reminiscing all of the memories I had the pleasure of making this season. 

Before school got out for the Summer I had made a list of all of the things I was longing to experience, and I'm proud to say that I crossed the majority of things off, with two exceptions that will just have to wait until Autumn graces us with her presence.

The list included: having a picnic, going to yard sales (lots!), spending a day at Green Lakes (x2), and spending a day at the beach (see below). 

The last few I finished this past weekend: spending a day with my grandma (made her dinner!), flying a kite, and going for a hike. 

This was not on the list, but I'm so grateful for it: STAYCATION!

Ben and I spent our Saturdays off together exploring new towns, thrifting/antiquing/yardsailing, walking along Lake Ontario, swimming(!), taking short road trips, eating ice cream, taking photos, going for long walks, going to the movies, and just enjoying our time together. These have become some of my favorite memories.

It has been a while since I've posted, and also a while since the 4th of July! That being said, here are my photos from that day. 

I spent the afternoon at the beach with 'the Bens'. This included a pb&j picnic in our new cooler, terrible tasting alcohol, new beach towels, ukulele playing, a floppy sunhat, new swimsuits, and most importantly: the first time Ben has ever gone swimming with me! In the 3+ years we have been dating, this is the only time he has ever swam. Crazy, right?!

After our beach trip we had a small backyard barbecue and walked to the bridge to watch fireworks with friends. Very low-key, but also very much the best.

Dress: Forever 21

Bikini Top: Unique Vintage

Bikini Bottoms: Modcloth

Floppy Hat: Target

Sunglasses: Target

I Was Made For Sunny Days

These photos were taken in mid-April on an unexpected day off.

Ben and I took a walk through the park and enjoyed the flowering trees and wonderful weather.

We wandered along and I found a perfect tree to climb (which is not such an easy thing to do in a skirt).

We enjoyed lunch at a cafe that we don't go to often and made a trip to the record store next door afterwards.

It was a perfect Spring day.

Coat: Forever 21

Blouse: Vanilla & Lace

Skirt: Thrifted - Gap

Sunglasses: Target

Shoes: Payless

You Fell In Love With The Sunshine

Lately my days have all looked a lot like this.

We've been having insane March weather this week. It's incredible and a little sad at the same time.

I absolutely love transitional seasons. I'm all about Spring and Autumn. Sure, the air smells sweet like Spring, but it feels a little too much like Summer. I just don't want Spring to pass on by without making a proper appearance - that's all. It's really hard to complain though, because I've been dreaming about warm weather for a while now.

Anyway, this week has been beautiful and wonderful. 

Last week was my Spring Break, but it didn't feel like much of one as I was on tour the whole time (which was fun, but entirely exhausting).

That being said I decided that I was going to sort of make my own Spring Break out of this gorgeous week. I mean, you can't expect a girl to stay inside and stay focused when it's sunny, warm, and everything's blooming, right?!

Well, I've really made the best of the week so far! How, you ask?! I've just gotten really good at ignoring all of the school stuff that usually stresses me out. I mean, sometimes you just need a good mental health day...er...um...week.

Here are the things that have made this week so great:

I treated myself to an apple-dominated lunch to make my Monday happier.

I met up with my pal Larkin and we went for a walk to the park and went on the swings.

I've spent the last three days laying on a quilt under the shade of a tree, near a log cabin, with a soft breeze blowing. For hours on end. It makes the time that I spend at school waiting for my next class so relaxing.

I also read the most wonderful comic: Asterios Polyp. I highly recommend it. Everything about it is incredible: the story, characters and the artwork. Plus, I definitely related to Hana, the main female character quite a bit.

During these lazy Spring adventures I indulged in a few of these French Toast Bagels, which I just discovered. They taste exactly how you think they would taste, and they're amazing.

Today I also had a picnic for one.

I really wish my Ben could have been with me with all my downtime at school, but it was really nice to have some much-needed time alone too. 

It's pretty incredible when the hardest part of your afternoon is finally deciding to stand up, put your shoes on, and go get lunch after lying on a blanket in the grass for two hours.

Ben and I also grilled in the dark with our good friends/downstairs neighbors Nick & Cheryl!

We also scored this really cute love seat on the curb near our house and it's the perfect final touch to my workspace. I love it. I'm looking forward to sunny, summer naps here soon. 

And this is how my day looks right about now meow. 

My week has really been just a blur of pastel blues and pinks as you can see. Oh, and sorry for the mass amounts of instagrams. I really just can't stop lately. I hope that's okay with you guys.

- Hannah